It may get us wondering why there are differences in kids of the same age; there are those who treat their parents like their friends; there are those who treat their parents like their bosses; and there are those who treat their parents like their fellow kids. But given the consistencies and similarities, what could be the reason behind these differences?
Wealth, social orientation and personal experience are only a few of those that influence parenting. We could already tell from those factors how badly or how well parenting could go.
But is there really a "right" way of parenting?
There is not really a "right" way to raise kids; rather, it ranges from good to bad. There might be some instances where good parenting goes wrong, or bad parenting goes right. But one must always put in mind that parenting is the foundation of a child's growth. No child would know how to commit wrongs without any guidance no matter what. Thus, this makes parenting a very intricate art—a very difficult skill—to put together. Parenting is a sport of control.
In order to raise good children, parents must know how to exercise control both with themselves and their children. Where there is control, there is discipline. And break the bandwagons. Discipline doesn't have to be harsh nor cruel. Control is hitting the sweet spot of children, making them understand what you want them to understand. But on one hand, discipline mustn't be done a little too much. Too much discipline (or too much harshness in trying to instill it) will result to children growing with both fear and hatred towards you.
A considerable fraction of teenagers today show that rearing kids in a very high level of discipline would lead them to feeling like they can't approach their parents to share their sentiments; thus inducing an emotion of helplessness and an advent of depression. In addition, kids, though in school age, are susceptible to pressure. They possess low emotional thresholds and could be depressed when pressured regarding school. On a second note, however, good parenting would not lead to kids having to be indifferent about their performance in school.
But effectivity doesn’t rely solely upon discipline. “Tabula rasa,” my teacher used to say, was the state how people were born. Zero. Empty. Nothingness. Neutrality. Oblivion.Plain. We all came from that—neither knowing the good nor the bad, or the supremes that live with us—and so do the kids. Parents write on these blank slates; they create their children.
After all, parenting varies from parent to parent, but the bottom line is, children do not create their character. Parents do.
by: Marielle Makilan, 16, incoming Grade 11 at University of Negros Occidental - Recoletos, Starlight Editor-in-Chief